Tuesday, September 21, 2010
When my husband and I found out that we were pregnant in January it was a surprise. There wasn't any work that went into it. It just happened. And I remember telling him I was a little sad because this baby happened so effortlessly that he wouldn't have a miracle story. You see, I had felt that my other two boys each had a miracle story. That they were on purpose. So why did this one just fall in our laps. Lesson #1 for the year, don't speak too soon.
Miracle #1~ I was 19 when I conceived my first son. No one would have pegged me as the perfect candidate for motherhood at that time. I was living it up in the San Fransisco Bay Area and having a great time. I often say that there was a lot of trouble to get into in the Bay Area and I tried to get into all of it. I was at dance clubs and raves regularly and hanging with people who were not child friendly. I was horrified when I found out I was expecting. This didn't fit into my life! But the night I found out I was pregnant I was at a friend's house and her father, who was a former pastor, was there. I was crying and lamenting over what I should do. I told him that I had promised God I wouldn't have an abortion if I got pregnant but that now I just don't know. I will never forget what he told me. He said that If I break my promise to God, he will forgive me. But that if I delivered on that promise (which was honestly more scary at this point!) He would lead me down the right path and take care of us. And that He has. My oldest son is a miracle because from the moment that I decided he would be mine, he saved me from myself. I lived for him and stopped being a "kid" and started being a mom. To this day I refer to him as m Angel. When you are young, single, & pregnant people feel free to ask you if it was an "accident". This was insulting to me. My son was on purpose. So my response was always that "Cars get in accidents. My son was a surprise." My son has taken equal care of me. He is the reason that I fell in love with my husband. We met when my son was 2yrs old and seeing my husband care for him and love him painted a picture for me of this man's character. I remember when we first started dating he said to me "If you ever put me before your child, I will walk". After a hearty laugh I told him it will never happen. But it was a sign that this man understood and respected who my son was to me and to us. My son is a miracle!
Miracle #2~ My husband and I dated for 6 years before getting married. We had been successfully (depending on the day!) raising our first son and were excited about the prospect of getting pregnant right after our wedding! Literally- I planned to get pregnant that night! But it didn't quite happen that way. So we kept at it with the light hearted outlook that at least trying was fun. But anyone who has suffered with trying to conceive will tell you that after a while, even the trying becomes work. Over the course of the next 2 years we tracked ovulation, suffered miscarriages, I was tested for a myriad of things, blood was drawn and Josh even went in for testing. After 2 years we were on the verge of IVF when we found out that we were pregnant again. My miscarriages were all early on so we rushed to the OB when we tested positive and he put me on Progesterone supplements 3 times a day in an effort to keep this baby in. I was told to rest often. My husband was told to do everything so that I could stay off my feet. And we made it through the first trimester & started enjoying what was coming! Then our little impatient baby dropped at 34 weeks and I was placed on modified bed rest in an effort to keep him in until lung development at 36 weeks. He was born at 37.5 weeks perfectly healthy! He was also a miracle! When I look back on the 2 years of trying and the miscarriages, I can now See that the timing wasn't right. But with this pregnancy the timing was perfect! He was on purpose! And he was perfect!
Miracle #3~ So skip to this pregnancy. If you don't know the story you have some catching up to do on my blog! Needless to say that my theory of this baby not having a miracle story was short lived. He has been a fighter from the beginning. He has turned our lives upside down. And we wanted him even when we didn't know it! He IS on purpose and he IS a miracle!
I know that every mom believes that their children are miracles. But each of my children have a story to back it up. They are the greatest of all miracles to us. God has strategically placed each of them in our lives. They are all on purpose. I am amazed to see them and kiss them every day. There literally isn't a day that goes by that my children don't hear "I love you" several times a day. Love is like food to children and mine are well fed!