Open post from my breasts

Dear makers of nursing bras- in all of your years making and selling nursing bras, have you ever consulted an actual mother? Let alone one with a cup size larger than an A? I am a naturally busty lady. I sport a D cup when I'm NOT breastfeeding. When you figure in breast milk and swollen glands, we're in the market for some serious support. By serious support I'm talkin' under wire and thick straps! Additionally, it needs to breathe. There's a lot going on in there. While you're at it we can add some sass to the bra too! Believe it or not, mommies like to feel a little sassy too and when we are wearing grandma style bras it socks our self esteem right in the gut!

I have gone shopping for nursing bras twice now since having my baby 2 months ago. The first trip I was so disgusted with the lack of style and support that I bought two sports bras that fastened in the front instead. These bras looked infinitely better, had support cups, and made me feel less like a milking cow and more like a hot mama! HOWEVER, they were racer back bras and the weight of my giant milk bags pulled the straps causing pain in my shoulders.

So back to the store I went! I finally found a bra in a DD size with under wire! But the fabric is so thin that my poor boobies look like they are melting. Boo. And the only color it came in was nude. A serious lack of sassiness. But it went home with me because I needed the under wire! I also grabbed 2 other bras in a DD that did not have under wire. WHY you would even MAKE DD bras without proper support I have no idea! They instantly age my breasts by about 30 years! And can I mention that I am actually an F but that the largest size I can find is a DD so everywhere I go I look like my breasts have breasts! I'm talking overflow ladies!

I am sure there are amazing DD and larger nursing bras out there. I am also sure that in order for me to own one I would have to search high and low and pay an exorbitant amount of money. Money that is better used on diapers right now.

Nursing bras are a necessary evil. They offer mommies ease in feeding, especially out in public. Because at home we can just let it all hang out! But for as much as we need them, we loathe them.

So I challenge you nursing bra makers of the world. Help a sista out. Talk to some actual moms. Design a beautiful, affordable bra that keeps the girls closer to their original location- above our belly buttons! With all the technology out there I'm sure we can make it happen. Until then, I'll be strapping my F boobs into my DD granny bra and waiting..... just waiting.

Never is a four letter word

Have you ever heard the term "Don't write checks with your mouth that your ass can't cash"? I learned a while ago that when you use the word "never" it's like asking the universe to book mark that idea, judgement, or opinion so you can circle back to it yourself at another point.

This can be any number of things. I'll give you an example. In my early twenties I had a smokin' hot body. When I met my husband he was impressed with my ability to eat anything. I wasn't the typical salad eater when we went out. I'd strap on the old feed bag with the rest of the guys. Foolishly I thought I'd keep this virile young metabolism forever! I also thought people "let" themselves get fat or out of shape. Like it was a choice for everyone. I would NEVER let myself get like THAT! Check written. At the age of 25 I started having these terrible back issues. My doctor thought it was a result of my jogging on cement and said it was a joint issue. I'd have the back pain every once and while. Then when I was 28 I was working out much more in preparation for my wedding. I had 3 flare ups in 6 months. So my doctor sent me in for an MRI where we discovered that I had 2 herniated disks in my lower back that aggravated my sciatic nerve. Awesome. My lifestyle was forever changed with that diagnosis. I put on 25 lbs the first year. Check Cashed.

Over the course of the years I've seen this happen time and time again in my own life. I've tried so hard to stop using the word "never". It's a four letter word! It's a dare to the universe! I have this image of God sitting up in heaven with his "lesson board". When you say things like "We'll NEVER break up!" or "When I have kids I'll NEVER yell at them!" or "I've NEVER lost my job because I'm a good employee". These are all lessons to be learned. You will break up because he or she turns out to be someone different than you fell in love with. You will yell at your kids because it is normal and unavoidable. And you will lose your job because your company goes under and the fact that you're a good employee can't save you.
It may not happen right away. It could be years down the road. But chances are that at some point you will experience the flip side of those statements. The universe is listening.

I figured this one out years ago. But there are still checks out there floating around. I still have outstanding "never's" that have their lesson attached to them. And try as I may to avoid the cashing process, it always catches up to me! But the bright side to all of these check cashings is that we grow and become empathetic to the people around us. We slowly learn that we are not the exception. That we are just like the people we judge. We become more capable of compassion and understanding. So keep an eye out for when your never checks head back to be cashed.

Babies SMILE

It's been a debate for years. But I don't know why. What is there to debate? Babies smile. Really. They do. It drives me absolutely insane when someone tells you that it's "just gas". If it IS gas, has it ever crossed any one's minds that maybe that fart or burp felt awesome and made the baby SMILE? How many times have you witnessed the relief and happiness any given adult experiences after a good gas letting followed up by a smile? Hmmmmmmm?

My babies have each came out the womb smiling. They smile at me. They smile in their sleep. They smile at nothing. But they smile. If babies can find it in themselves to be responsible for feelings of unhappiness as early as the moment they are born, then why is it so far fetched to believe that they can also understand happiness?

Babies are pure emotion as they feel their way through this new world. They are emotion and subsequent reaction to that emotion. If they are tired they sleep. If their tummy hurts they fuss. If they are upset they cry. And if they are happy they smile. Big beautiful baby smiles!

If you still don't think that babies smile, keep it to yourself. Because parents love their baby smiles. They light up our days! They are what we live for! They make the sleepless nights, the dirty diapers, and the post baby body all worth it. Baby smiles are why we try for months to conceive, suffer IVF, bed rest, and a whole other flurry of hardships in our attempts to be parents. It's all for that beautiful baby smile! It's pure, it's real, and it's all for us!