Wednesday, February 16, 2011

I'm Melting

I had my baby 5 months ago. So I'm hitting a stage in my post pregnancy life that I had blocked out after my last two babies. It's the stage where your body fat starts to go away (YIPPEE!). But you still have all that pregnancy skin left (BOOOOOOO!). This combination creates the appearance you are melting.

Oh you know what I'm talking about. Let's start up top. My chins. My face was round and adorable pregnant. Now, it's all slid off my face and is precariously dangling off my neck below my chin. Awesome.

Heading a bit south we reach the breasts. I'm still breast feeding so it's not as bad as it's gonna get. But I like to describe post breast feeding boobs as "An egg in a sock". You know, when you bend over after the shower to dry your legs and your boobs just dangle an egg in a sock.

Now head around back. Because we have another set of boobs making an appearance below your shoulder blades. That’s right! It's our old friend back fat! Once again, what was taut in pregnancy must now sag.

Back around front ladies we will find every new mom's arch nemesis. You know it. I know it. It's the post baby belly. This lovely piece of real estate can only be compared to a large deflated balloon. I just sit and poke mine. I dig my fingers in trying to find any sign of abdominal muscle. Nope. Not a sign.

Finally we move back around once more to take a look at what used to be your bum. I have a saying that wraps up my post pregnancy bum. "My J-Lo booty has turned into a Jell-O booty". Awe. Some.

This is not my first rodeo so I am aware that things will start to move closer to their original location in time. But it's this phase that I loathe. Where it looks like parts of my body are melting off and into a puddle on the floor around me. Here’s the part where I coo “But it was all worth it and I’d do it again!”. Um. No. I’m almost 35. This will never happen again.

Now where’d I put that Shake Weight?


  1. Hahaha, YES. I've so been there. Melting is the perfect way to describe it.

    Stopping by and following from Bloggy Moms :o)


  2. Ok, I love your site - Too funny!!
    Stopping by from Bloggy Moms to say HI and follow on GFC. Looking forward to your visit @
    Take care,

  3. Wonderful and sadly true descriptions of a post baby body. It does get better but as I'm finding out, then we have to face the post baby, pre-40's body that kinda looks good but is also in the process of melting. Love your sense of humor!

  4. Hilarious. Looking forward to your posts, following you now on GFC from Bloggy Moms.

  5. Fun-Ny!Found you on Bloggy Moms. You can follow me at:

    See you around.

  6. I just got turned on to your blog yesterday and I love it!
    I gave you a Stylish Blogger Award!

  7. I had a baby 5 months ago as well! And I thank you for writing out what is happening with my body, because it does help to process it.
    Oh, well, what can we do?

    You are very funny. I will be back and I am your newest follower. Stop by my place!

  8. Your funny Melting LOL, Yes our bodies go through so much it's not fair but worth it, I'm going to start to follow you ;)